Hot. Long time ago, no mo AC. Play water gun.
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Pig
for Joe
You devoured our stories and poems. You are teaching still. —– Two hands resting on your cane. The Godfather of Grammar. —– 12-words Pain in da ass. Writer. Drinker. Da New Yawker stay home now.
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Uncle’s Advice, pt. 2
Part 1 So what da buggah said? Coach said, “Can try again if I like.” You see. Can. No use. No can. I no can. Remembah da book, you used to like? Da small choo-choo train pull da whole line of cars up da hill. All da big trains tell “No use.” Or “No can.”…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Uncle’s Advice
So what da buggah said? Coach said, “Can try again if I like.” You see. Can. No use. No can. I no can. Remembah da book, you used to like? Da small choo-choo train pull da whole line of cars up da hill. All da big trains tell “No use.” Or “No can.” Or “No…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Uncle and Honeymoon Shrimp
Ho las’ night me and Aunty went Wo Fat and order honeymoon shrimp. What’s dat? Dey take one broccoli, you like broccoli eh? And den dey make one slit in da shrimp and poke da stem part thru da shrimp. Honeymoon shrimp. Was mo bettah den my own honeymoon. Hee, hee. What’s da honeymoon part?…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Uncle Saves May Day
Boy, wassamattah? I no can skip. Fo what you gotta skip. Maybe hop or jump. But skip no need. Fo da May Day Maypole Dance. Try show me. I no can. See. Hmm. You know why, you starting off on da wrong foot. You stay left hand, eh? Jes start on da uddah side. Nevah…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Kau Yuk
You play basketball eh? Yeah, but we junk. I evah told you our basketball team went from last place to first? Cause of Kau Yuk. Like da red pork? Dats his name, Kau Yuk? Yeah. We call him dat cause he look like kau yuk. Lotta fat, little bit meat, and red all ovah. He…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Dog
Helping Ah Po to Her Feet
Long time ago, girls only good fo marry off. Like one ox. Can work or can sell. If you no can work, you gotta marry. Maybe if his family rich, can get one ox. Father wanted a boy to teach how to read and write. Mother had big ideas. Big feet, gotta work in the…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Rooster
Chinese New Year
—Uncle, when is Chinese New Year? “Ah-so, little Gas-hoppah. Lemme consult my calendah…” —You gotta consult da lunar calendar? “All kine calendar gotta consult. Chinese New Year sometimes January, sometimes February. If da pa-kes had their way, would be in March too!” —How come? Supposed to be da new moon in January. “Not so fast,…
Bamboo Shoots Submission for Year of the Rooster
Auntie Visits The Cemetary
“Which one is Mother? How you know das her name? Long time ago get all kine rules: who can go graveyard, who no can. Depend on how old you stay. Da pa-kes get anykine rules. Mostly superstition. I no believe but if somebody tell you someting, if you no follow and den someting bad happen,…